mejo nakakarelate ako sa sitwasyon mo ngayon ah. hehe. wala lang. I know the feeling. I've been through your situation and I can feel that I'm currently into something like that right now and it's very hard, actually napakahirap. minsan gusto mo na bumigay pero kinakaya pa rin. aw ang EMO pala. hahaha.
hindi ko man alam kung anong side mo pero sa palagay ko naiintindihan kita. wala man akong alam sa nararanasan mo ngayon, pero payo ko lang sa'yo, wala mang nakakaintindi sa'yo, nagkakamali ka, anjan lagi si GOD handang buhatin ka sa sandaling ikaw ay bumagsak, handang damayan ka sa oras nang pangangailangan at handang akayin ka sa panahon na ikaw ay hirap na hirap na. Isa pa, always continue to attend bible studies cause it will greatly help you. and also don't forget that God is always there for you, just trust Him and always pray, and everything will be just fine.
Marahil, wala na ngang nakakaintindi sa'yo, sabihin na nating naiintindihan kita kahit papaano, sabi nga birs of the same feathers flock together, pero darating ang panahon na may isang taong kahit di mo kilala at estranghero sa iyo ay para bang matagal na kayong magkakilala at ang pagintindi sa iyo ay parang tulad ng Diyos, at marahil ito ay sugo ni God para maging isa sa mga kaibigan mo na TUNAY at kailanman ay hindi ka pagiisipan ng masama at di ka iiwan. Marahil anjan lang siya sa tabi-tabi di mo lang napapansin o di kaya'y darating pa lamang siya. hehe :)
Sa panahon ngayon, tama ka, mahirap nga magtiwala, ngunit wag mo namang ilimit ang sarili mo, kahit papaano ay maging bukas ka sa mga taong sa tingin mo ay hindi ka bibiguin. At sa oras na biguin ka ng mga taong ito, hayaan mo nalamang sila, may nararapat na consequences para sa kanila ang Diyos. Ipagdasal mo na lamang ito at lagi kang magtiwala.
Mahirap talaga magpakatao pero maging tao parang chicken lang yan. Sa unang tingin kala mo anghel, pero pag talikod mo naman, poncio pilato pala. hehe. ganon talaga. masanay ka na.
Bakit nga pa ganoon, tinuringan pang mga kawangis tayo ni Hesus, pero mismong tayong mga tao dinudungisan ang linyang iyon. Isa lang masasabi ko, hindi si Hesus ang may kasalanan noon, kundi tayo ring mga tao, masyado tayong marunong at mayabang, ang akala natin kaya na natin ang lahat dahil sabi nga tayo ang superior at pinakamataas na nilalang na nilikha ng Diyos. Tama nga pero ang hindi natin isinasaisip ay lahat may hangganan at mas may nakakataas pa sa atin at eto ay ang lumikha sa atin.
kung minsan masarap mangarap na sana dumating ang pagkakataon na mapunta tayo sa isang paraiso na walang kaguluhan, subalit puro katahimikan at matiwasay ang kapaligiran. Naroroon lahat ang kabutihan at nananatili ang kapayapaan. Subalit malabo itong mangyari. Kung hindi matututo tayong mga tao nang tamang paraan ng pamumuhay, napakalabo na mangyari ang ganitong mundo. Kung patuloy tayo sa ganitong pamumuhay, gulo at karahasan ang ating masasaksihan, pati ang mga kinabukasan ng henerasyon ay naglaho na dahil sa impluwensya ng mundo. Kung minsan naman gusto na nating matulog ng mahimbing at kailanma'y huwag nang magising, subalit hindi rin magawa sa dami ng mga rason. Totoo nga namang napakahirap ang mabuhay sa ibabaw ng mundo.
Hayaan nalang natin darating ang panahon, mararanasan rin natin ang paraiso na para sa atin, ang lugar kung saan nasasa tabi nating ang lumikha at mamumuhay tayo ng walang hanggang kasiyahan at katahimikan. Panahon at pagkakataon lang makapagsasabi kung kailan ito mangyayari. At si Hesus lang ang may kapangyarihan na mangyari ito.
Huwag tayong masyado kabahan sa ating kapalaran, kahit na kung minsan kapalaran ang nagsasabi sa atin kung anong dapat nating gawin. Samakatuwid nasa mga kamay pa rin natin ang ating kapalaran, ang ating kinabukasan, nariyan lang si Hesus upang tayo'y gabayan. Hawak natin ang ating kapalaran kung kaya ingatan natin ito ng mabuti at laging ipasaDiyos ang mga ito.
Magtiwala ka lamang at sa huli makakamit mo ang nais mo.
Darating ang panahon, Kahit papaano, May isang tao, na lubusan kang MAIINTINDIHAN!
"someday somehow someone will understand"
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Saturday, August 9, 2008
got this from rhiell
Where is the person you miss the most?
somewhere in diliman.
Do you think your ex still likes you?
i have no idea... :((
What do you hear?
not much...
Whats your current problem?
many things...
Do you have a best friend?
YES I HAVE!! true friends also... :)
If the person who hurt you the most in your life apologized and told you that they loved you, what would you say?
I will accept it of course. God Himself knows how to forgive you just ask for it.
Who was the last person who looked at you and smiled?
define? haha. kuya jr!
Most recent lesson learned?
someday somehow someone will understand---don't ever let go of the truth because the truth will set you free
What is the last show you watched on TV?
i dunno. :)
Could you ever be friends again with someone that broke your heart?
depends!! Pero i guess yes
Who do you talk to when you're sad?
many things... Most of the time i listen to Hillsong musics. Often times I talked nonsense but most of the time I talk something about God to make me realize that I shouldn't be sad but be rejoice because I have Jesus with me, I have my family and friends
Who did you last talk to in person?
family=mother and sister... friends=kuya robin
Do you have an accent?
i don't think sow...
Have you ever liked somebody and never told them?
yeah!
Do you hate people who are obsessed with things like High School Musical, and hannah montana?
no am not. everything's fine.
Who was the last person you had an argument with?
wala naman ata...
What do you wish you had at this moment?
that everything will be just fine.
Last person you gave up on?
errr...
Last time you watched someone flirt with someone you were interested in?
3rd year hs
Do you go to the library?
yes...
Does someone have a crush on you?
maybe?!?
Do You and your best friend have 'a song'? What is it?
huh? ewan. di naman nya alam na tinuturing ko syang bestfriends. siguro true friends kami. pero gusto ko syang maging bestfriend. xa ung tipo ng tao na kaibigan hanggang kamatayan!!
How many TRUE friends do you have?
idk. all i know is i have them, they will be there hoping they won't leave me.
Is there anyone that you care more about than yourself?
ofcourse...
Vegetarian?
nope
Have you ever done anything illegal?
i guess.
Hair color?
dark brown or black
Future child's name?
dunno
Would you date someone with a child?
it's ok as long as she has no husband
Are you currently jealous?
maybe.
Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
n/a
wala naman ata
Do you trust all of your friends?
i trust them all (real/true frieds) i just hope they won't abuse my trust and trash it.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Anything that goes with my mood
i do not know what to speak of, i do not know what to act nor i do not know what to think of better things that could come up with my mind.
i never realized it could be this stressful, depressing and it's like a sedation that changes to panic and nausea, And breath starts to shorten and heartbeats pound softer.
the adrenalin is ranging from high to low and low to high yet the nothing is really varying. Cause it caught me off guard, now I'm running and screaming.
i never imagined it could astray this distant although no matter how far it goes it keeps on seeking a path, direction in its point of origin.
i never thought that it could break me apart i keep a sinister smile and a hold of my heart, but not this time. I won't try to philosophize!
It's better off this way, for all the dirty looks. I'm not okay. To be a joke and look, another line. without a hook. I'm not okay.
i thought I'm off free, but i was wrong, so wrong that insanity beats me up. I'll never make it on my own. I can never be that someone.
i can never have the urge for what I'm looking for, I can never have the courage to continue what I'm fighting for. I'm getting weaker and weaker as time goes by. and I pray for someone to get a grip off my dilemma.
It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again. I'm awake in the infinite cold. How I wish this would halt!
Honestly.
Emptiness have finally arrived! Words have more meaning, if they're said at certain times.
"Kasama kitang lumuha
Dahil sa‘yo ako’y may pag-asa
Ang awiting ito’y para sa‘yo
At kung maubos ang tinig, di magsisisi
Dahil iyong narinig mula sa labi ko
Salamat"
I'm sick and tired of everything.
My hopes are so high, that your kiss might kill me. So won't you kill me, so I die happy.
Broken this fragile thing now, and I can't, I can't pick up the pieces, and I've thrown my words all around, I feel so broken up, And I give up, I just...
I hear the ticking of the clock, I'm lying here the room's pitch dark. No answer on the telephone
and the night goes by so very slow. Oh I hope that it won't end though
i know nothing.
Welcome to the planet. Welcome to existence. Everyone's here. What happens next. I dare!
No one knows what it's like. To be the bad man. To be the sad man. Behind blue eyes. And no one knows. What it's like to be hated. To be fated to telling only lies.
"I was born to tell you I love you
and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight
And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes
me want to come back home"
it's already 9:42 in the morning and I'm still not done with this blog. I suddenly slept off my computer is left turned on.
I can't think of anything else just to pursue this crap. I'm still sleepy and I'm not in the mood to day. I feel weak and all.
to be continued...
i never realized it could be this stressful, depressing and it's like a sedation that changes to panic and nausea, And breath starts to shorten and heartbeats pound softer.
the adrenalin is ranging from high to low and low to high yet the nothing is really varying. Cause it caught me off guard, now I'm running and screaming.
i never imagined it could astray this distant although no matter how far it goes it keeps on seeking a path, direction in its point of origin.
i never thought that it could break me apart i keep a sinister smile and a hold of my heart, but not this time. I won't try to philosophize!
It's better off this way, for all the dirty looks. I'm not okay. To be a joke and look, another line. without a hook. I'm not okay.
i thought I'm off free, but i was wrong, so wrong that insanity beats me up. I'll never make it on my own. I can never be that someone.
i can never have the urge for what I'm looking for, I can never have the courage to continue what I'm fighting for. I'm getting weaker and weaker as time goes by. and I pray for someone to get a grip off my dilemma.
It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again. I'm awake in the infinite cold. How I wish this would halt!
Honestly.
Emptiness have finally arrived! Words have more meaning, if they're said at certain times.
"Kasama kitang lumuha
Dahil sa‘yo ako’y may pag-asa
Ang awiting ito’y para sa‘yo
At kung maubos ang tinig, di magsisisi
Dahil iyong narinig mula sa labi ko
Salamat"
I'm sick and tired of everything.
My hopes are so high, that your kiss might kill me. So won't you kill me, so I die happy.
Broken this fragile thing now, and I can't, I can't pick up the pieces, and I've thrown my words all around, I feel so broken up, And I give up, I just...
I hear the ticking of the clock, I'm lying here the room's pitch dark. No answer on the telephone
and the night goes by so very slow. Oh I hope that it won't end though
i know nothing.
Welcome to the planet. Welcome to existence. Everyone's here. What happens next. I dare!
No one knows what it's like. To be the bad man. To be the sad man. Behind blue eyes. And no one knows. What it's like to be hated. To be fated to telling only lies.
"I was born to tell you I love you
and I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight
And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes
me want to come back home"
it's already 9:42 in the morning and I'm still not done with this blog. I suddenly slept off my computer is left turned on.
I can't think of anything else just to pursue this crap. I'm still sleepy and I'm not in the mood to day. I feel weak and all.
to be continued...
Monday, July 14, 2008
Saturday, June 28, 2008
confused, tired and frustrated...
today i woke up so late, it was like past 11 in the morning, couple of minutes before the clock strikes 12. i was supposed to wake up early, early as in 5 or 6am in the morning to work out and do the things i have to do, indeed i did wake up between those time ive set, unfortunately im not in the mood to stand up and prepare for the day due to the coldness of my room, i didn't reduce the level of my thermostat. aw. there, so i stayed for an additional 5-6 hours in bed.
when i finally woke up, stand and fix myself, i saw my laptop turned on, i realize i didn't turn it off last night. i went downstairs and saw my food is already prepared by ate doy. I didn't want to eat rice so i decided to eat bread and ham inside it. i grab some fit n right in the frige and sat to watch tv programs. so i watched for an hour or more i think until i asked ate doy to prepare some lunch. I ate but after i went upstairs to work on the things i have to do. it was like past 2pm. but im not in the mood to work so i just emailed my groupmates on what to do. i decided to surf and surf and i said to myself and to my groupmates that we'll work when the sun sets, like past 5pm or so. but i think we formally started working like 6pm.
everything's messed up, jumbled, im using 2 laptops, kuya robin's net is disconnecting every now and then. so we turned down the conference so that everything will be organized and accordingly. it was hard really. talking to 2 persons at the same time, using keyboard. so i and kuya jr decided to use voice chat. while i and jacy decided to type. because jacy don't have speaker at the moment and her brother is using their laptop. so there.
we work and work and work. we're almost halfway finish on the intro and related lit. a couple of revisions and additional infos. and for the methodology we plan to make it when dian is available. so we decided to use agile methodology not spiral methodology. cause jacy said it's more appropriate.
now it's already 10:49 in the evening a couple of minutes before 11pm and im still not done with our background of the project. it's almost halfway done but still marami pa rin ang kulang. im again not in the mood to continue it cause if i will force myself, it might turn out to be a mess so i decided to blog all the things i want to blog, whatever blog. haha :))
my family is still not here, they went last wednesday to batangas, then to mindoro, then to boracay, then to caticlan-aklan, then finally to negros occ. For the first time, they didn't ride on a plane and it was their first time to take the cargo ship because they brought a car with them. awts too bad for me i dunno when will i be able to experience a long cargo/ferry trip. amps. i never had one. oh i had but it's only like 6-8 hours. i made a trip once like 14 hours but it's a road trip. while the trip to negros occ ff the batangas route is like more than a day. so there. but i think they're in busay. soo sad i never get the chance to join the escapade because of these damn painstaking studies! aw. haha :)) kidding. but it's ok there's always a second time. anyway, i might not enjoy the trip and just stay in the car because i think they took a cargo ship, ro-ro, roll-on roll-off not the super ferry. because they took the batangas route. and what i want is the super ferry so that i would definitely enjoy the trip. haha :)) they might be back this week or maybe next week. i dunno.
so now im just contemplating. thinking. set my thoughts on some matters that's rumbling in my mind. aw. i never get the chance to fix everything. :(( everythin's messed up and still messing up. double sigh....
im always thinking of things that's makin' me loose my concentrations on more important things like studies, families and friends. but i can't blame my thoughts and feelings, it suddenly passes by with a sudden gust of cold/warm wind. aw.
im currently listening to a korean song, it's a st in witch yoo hee. tryin' to find out if it's nice because kuya jr ask me to listen to it and find out what. well i find it nice though. but i like more other korean songs like the ost of full house and forbidden live or nine tailed fox sounds naruto isn't it? haha :))
okay back to writing. so where was i na nga? aw. haha amps. i searched for importand cds kasi. uhm ndi pala. aun basta naghanap ako ng mga cds. ndi ko makita dl nalang sa net. haha :)) kasalanan na naman un sa law at kay lord. pls forgive me :)
ayan ala nako sa mood to discuss the things na dapat nakalagay talaga dito. aw. ive been obstructed by some sort of something. anu kaya un? haha :))
toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooootttttttttttttt..
i have to sleep na it's 12:45 mn and i still need to go to church at 7am! awts too early. must wake up early.
if ever i will.. not??
next time nalng....
i might !!! haah :))
i never really had problems with this matter, it's just i dunno it turned out to be a problem lately. and now i have a lot more problem. i dunno what's wrong with me. it turned to be that im falling again. shux i can't believe im sayin this but im really stuck in the past. stuck with yanna. crap. why does it have to be this way. i tried to stop my emotions but it never halt. in fact it still continue to grow and grow. damn. oi para kay lora at ian at kung sinung friend/contact ko dito sa multiply shut lang kau jan! ehem. getting back... i never realized that it could be this worst. aw.. :(( oh well i just have to admit the fact that i still love her. hahaha :)) i made a crap of reflection for persef2 i dunno if i blog it. becos im suppose to blog all my reflections but im thinking ill just post it in blogspot. haha :)) im shy. awts.....
it's killing me grrrrr....
i don't need a girl!! haha counterpart of i don't need a man.... ndi pala girl woman pala.
haha jowk lang !! :))
maybe they were right, i have to move on. but how? where will i start? like from scratch? hell no!! amps.. tellin to myself that im not in love with here and im over it the fact that im lying to myself. pakshet naman oh!! cuts wrist nalng!!!. ----- nccra na ulo ko dito. haha. if ill do that im just foolin myself. no way. bahala na!! what tfh.
tapos academics pa. lmang na ata mga extra cur ko kesa academics. tama na to. resign na!! haha joke lang. :) kaya ko to 70:30 70% acads 30% extra cur yeah..!!!
i need a 2.5 up in calculus. please give it to me. puleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezzzzz!!
it's now or never. haha
how bout friends. well it's fine goin' smooth. friends who left, never came back but still they are there, they were good friends but not anymore. maybe just have to live our separate ways. thanks to them they became part of my life hoping it will happen again like in some movie saying "history has to repeat itself ata. i think from hp! haha :)) thanks, super..
friends who stayed, thanks rin. you stayed. un lang.
bestfriends i left, im sori but we have to part. we're living on diff worlds now. i mean we're so apart, no not that. i mean it just happen so quick i duuno why. but still you'll always remain my bestfriend until we learn how to get back together like the old times. :)
bestfriends who left me. ala naman ata. ahah:))
bestfriends at present. they were good. they were nice. i love them all. i trust them most importantly they are ohana! haha :)) wierd. they are there meant to stay with me forever till we grow up till the crabs learn to fly and the birds have claws. till the end of the world, until we die. aw naman. but.......... i dunno...
parang my something. hahaha. :__ hirap eh.. dunno how to express it.
i don't want to fool myself anymore. i mean basta. i don't know myself anymore, i think it's not me anymore, ive changed a lot and now im tryin my best to go back to where ive started to where i belong.
i can be that person but i dunno, i don't want to kid around, i ain't fooling no one. im at times but i don't want to be somebody else just to please my friends, just to fit in their world; to be so studious and tedious and responsible lasallian just to prove that im good, to be a dl i once have the chance i just lost it, to be somebody else, to be a good leader and many more, to be so religious and holy that everysong in my pc, cp, mp3 player and anywhere are hillsong and christian songs, everywhere i look i see lyrics and scriptures which pertains to those things, to listen to korean,jap and chinese songs, to go to parties, jamming and malls, to make a fool of other people, to be cool, and a lot more, to be sp active in lots of orgs, to be an officer, to make sacrifices, to be a faci, to make things against my will, to think of others and not think of myself, to prove something.. do i have to be like that just to fit in their world? ok im like that at times but the big question is that do i need to be somebody so that they will be more comfortable, more pleased with me?
mahirap. haha beleive me!!! :))
but it doesn't matter. well i dunno. for me it matters when i think of it when it reaches the top of my mind.
what else do i need to prove to make it right? just like a geometry problem, i need to prove it first to know that the statement is correct. the only difference is that both ends coincides, it can be proven first but it can be proven later.
i dunno where this blog would end? i dunno when this will end also. haha:)) crap!
haha. hindi ko na inisip ung makakabasa nito. bahala na kung anung comments.. sana good comments.. :)) aw ..
im currently listening to osts of forbbiden love aka gumiho wenjuh or nine tailed fox. i like it soo much. hehe :)) yan ung dinownload ko ksi diku makita ung cd nung sis ko dami kasi.
ui anggaling magkapantay ung dalwang smiley. haha anu ba yan! aw. indi pa ko inaantok awts.
must contemplate more.
to be continued...
when i finally woke up, stand and fix myself, i saw my laptop turned on, i realize i didn't turn it off last night. i went downstairs and saw my food is already prepared by ate doy. I didn't want to eat rice so i decided to eat bread and ham inside it. i grab some fit n right in the frige and sat to watch tv programs. so i watched for an hour or more i think until i asked ate doy to prepare some lunch. I ate but after i went upstairs to work on the things i have to do. it was like past 2pm. but im not in the mood to work so i just emailed my groupmates on what to do. i decided to surf and surf and i said to myself and to my groupmates that we'll work when the sun sets, like past 5pm or so. but i think we formally started working like 6pm.
everything's messed up, jumbled, im using 2 laptops, kuya robin's net is disconnecting every now and then. so we turned down the conference so that everything will be organized and accordingly. it was hard really. talking to 2 persons at the same time, using keyboard. so i and kuya jr decided to use voice chat. while i and jacy decided to type. because jacy don't have speaker at the moment and her brother is using their laptop. so there.
we work and work and work. we're almost halfway finish on the intro and related lit. a couple of revisions and additional infos. and for the methodology we plan to make it when dian is available. so we decided to use agile methodology not spiral methodology. cause jacy said it's more appropriate.
now it's already 10:49 in the evening a couple of minutes before 11pm and im still not done with our background of the project. it's almost halfway done but still marami pa rin ang kulang. im again not in the mood to continue it cause if i will force myself, it might turn out to be a mess so i decided to blog all the things i want to blog, whatever blog. haha :))
my family is still not here, they went last wednesday to batangas, then to mindoro, then to boracay, then to caticlan-aklan, then finally to negros occ. For the first time, they didn't ride on a plane and it was their first time to take the cargo ship because they brought a car with them. awts too bad for me i dunno when will i be able to experience a long cargo/ferry trip. amps. i never had one. oh i had but it's only like 6-8 hours. i made a trip once like 14 hours but it's a road trip. while the trip to negros occ ff the batangas route is like more than a day. so there. but i think they're in busay. soo sad i never get the chance to join the escapade because of these damn painstaking studies! aw. haha :)) kidding. but it's ok there's always a second time. anyway, i might not enjoy the trip and just stay in the car because i think they took a cargo ship, ro-ro, roll-on roll-off not the super ferry. because they took the batangas route. and what i want is the super ferry so that i would definitely enjoy the trip. haha :)) they might be back this week or maybe next week. i dunno.
so now im just contemplating. thinking. set my thoughts on some matters that's rumbling in my mind. aw. i never get the chance to fix everything. :(( everythin's messed up and still messing up. double sigh....
im always thinking of things that's makin' me loose my concentrations on more important things like studies, families and friends. but i can't blame my thoughts and feelings, it suddenly passes by with a sudden gust of cold/warm wind. aw.
im currently listening to a korean song, it's a st in witch yoo hee. tryin' to find out if it's nice because kuya jr ask me to listen to it and find out what. well i find it nice though. but i like more other korean songs like the ost of full house and forbidden live or nine tailed fox sounds naruto isn't it? haha :))
okay back to writing. so where was i na nga? aw. haha amps. i searched for importand cds kasi. uhm ndi pala. aun basta naghanap ako ng mga cds. ndi ko makita dl nalang sa net. haha :)) kasalanan na naman un sa law at kay lord. pls forgive me :)
ayan ala nako sa mood to discuss the things na dapat nakalagay talaga dito. aw. ive been obstructed by some sort of something. anu kaya un? haha :))
toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooootttttttttttttt..
i have to sleep na it's 12:45 mn and i still need to go to church at 7am! awts too early. must wake up early.
if ever i will.. not??
next time nalng....
i might !!! haah :))
i never really had problems with this matter, it's just i dunno it turned out to be a problem lately. and now i have a lot more problem. i dunno what's wrong with me. it turned to be that im falling again. shux i can't believe im sayin this but im really stuck in the past. stuck with yanna. crap. why does it have to be this way. i tried to stop my emotions but it never halt. in fact it still continue to grow and grow. damn. oi para kay lora at ian at kung sinung friend/contact ko dito sa multiply shut lang kau jan! ehem. getting back... i never realized that it could be this worst. aw.. :(( oh well i just have to admit the fact that i still love her. hahaha :)) i made a crap of reflection for persef2 i dunno if i blog it. becos im suppose to blog all my reflections but im thinking ill just post it in blogspot. haha :)) im shy. awts.....
it's killing me grrrrr....
i don't need a girl!! haha counterpart of i don't need a man.... ndi pala girl woman pala.
haha jowk lang !! :))
maybe they were right, i have to move on. but how? where will i start? like from scratch? hell no!! amps.. tellin to myself that im not in love with here and im over it the fact that im lying to myself. pakshet naman oh!! cuts wrist nalng!!!. ----- nccra na ulo ko dito. haha. if ill do that im just foolin myself. no way. bahala na!! what tfh.
tapos academics pa. lmang na ata mga extra cur ko kesa academics. tama na to. resign na!! haha joke lang. :) kaya ko to 70:30 70% acads 30% extra cur yeah..!!!
i need a 2.5 up in calculus. please give it to me. puleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeezzzzz!!
it's now or never. haha
how bout friends. well it's fine goin' smooth. friends who left, never came back but still they are there, they were good friends but not anymore. maybe just have to live our separate ways. thanks to them they became part of my life hoping it will happen again like in some movie saying "history has to repeat itself ata. i think from hp! haha :)) thanks, super..
friends who stayed, thanks rin. you stayed. un lang.
bestfriends i left, im sori but we have to part. we're living on diff worlds now. i mean we're so apart, no not that. i mean it just happen so quick i duuno why. but still you'll always remain my bestfriend until we learn how to get back together like the old times. :)
bestfriends who left me. ala naman ata. ahah:))
bestfriends at present. they were good. they were nice. i love them all. i trust them most importantly they are ohana! haha :)) wierd. they are there meant to stay with me forever till we grow up till the crabs learn to fly and the birds have claws. till the end of the world, until we die. aw naman. but.......... i dunno...
parang my something. hahaha. :__ hirap eh.. dunno how to express it.
i don't want to fool myself anymore. i mean basta. i don't know myself anymore, i think it's not me anymore, ive changed a lot and now im tryin my best to go back to where ive started to where i belong.
i can be that person but i dunno, i don't want to kid around, i ain't fooling no one. im at times but i don't want to be somebody else just to please my friends, just to fit in their world; to be so studious and tedious and responsible lasallian just to prove that im good, to be a dl i once have the chance i just lost it, to be somebody else, to be a good leader and many more, to be so religious and holy that everysong in my pc, cp, mp3 player and anywhere are hillsong and christian songs, everywhere i look i see lyrics and scriptures which pertains to those things, to listen to korean,jap and chinese songs, to go to parties, jamming and malls, to make a fool of other people, to be cool, and a lot more, to be sp active in lots of orgs, to be an officer, to make sacrifices, to be a faci, to make things against my will, to think of others and not think of myself, to prove something.. do i have to be like that just to fit in their world? ok im like that at times but the big question is that do i need to be somebody so that they will be more comfortable, more pleased with me?
mahirap. haha beleive me!!! :))
but it doesn't matter. well i dunno. for me it matters when i think of it when it reaches the top of my mind.
what else do i need to prove to make it right? just like a geometry problem, i need to prove it first to know that the statement is correct. the only difference is that both ends coincides, it can be proven first but it can be proven later.
i dunno where this blog would end? i dunno when this will end also. haha:)) crap!
haha. hindi ko na inisip ung makakabasa nito. bahala na kung anung comments.. sana good comments.. :)) aw ..
im currently listening to osts of forbbiden love aka gumiho wenjuh or nine tailed fox. i like it soo much. hehe :)) yan ung dinownload ko ksi diku makita ung cd nung sis ko dami kasi.
ui anggaling magkapantay ung dalwang smiley. haha anu ba yan! aw. indi pa ko inaantok awts.
must contemplate more.
to be continued...
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